Funny quotes
(page 8)
ALF: Kate, have I ever lied to you?
Kate: Yes. Several times.
ALF: I meant today.
[the cat Lucky has died and the Tanners are having a funeral for him]
ALF: I'm reminded of a prayer he used to recite every night before going to bed, "And if I die before I wake, chicken-fry me like a steak."
ALF: [about Lucky] Last time I saw him he was high-tailing it out the window.
Willie: And why was that?
ALF: Cause I was chasing him with a fork.
In the first place, God made idiots. That was for practice. Then he made school boards.
I arise in the morning torn between a desire to improve the world and a desire to enjoy the world. This makes it hard to plan the day.
I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying.
Hi, Dexter! Oooooo, what does this button do?
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