Funny quotes
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I love mankind; it's people I can't stand.
Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city.
Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company.
I wanted to buy a candle holder, but the store didn't have one. So I got a cake.
I'm willing to admit that I may not always be right, but I am never wrong.
Democracy is being allowed to vote for the candidate you dislike least.
I drink to make other people interesting.
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