Dog
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I love women, but I feel like you can't trust some of them. Some of them are liars, you know? Like I was in the park and I met this girl, she was cute and she had a dog. And I went up to her, we started talking. She told me her dog's name. Then I said, 'Does he bite?' She said, 'No'. And I said, 'Oh yeah? Then how does he eat?' Liar.
Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read.
My little dog — a heartbeat at my feet.
There's a saying. If you want someone to love you forever, buy a dog, feed it and keep it around.
Man is an animal that makes bargains: no other animal does this — no dog exchanges bones with another.
Does not the gratitude of the dog put to shame any man who is ungrateful to his benefactors?
The highest compliment that you can pay me is to say that I work hard every day, that I never dog it.
A puppy plays with every pup he meets, but an old dog has few associates.
We can stop the cycle of animal homelessness and save lives by opening our hearts and homes to a loving cat or dog from an animal shelter instead of buying animals from breeders or pet shops.
When you adopt a dog, you have a lot of very good days and one very bad day.
My favorite type of pet has always been a dog. They're loyal, kind, and offer endless affection. My friend Eric says, 'The more people I meet, the more I like my dog'. Funny thought.
Dogs have boundless enthusiasm but no sense of shame. I should have a dog as a life coach.
Yesterday I was a dog. Today I'm a dog. Tomorrow I'll probably still be a dog. Sigh! There's so little hope for advancement.
It is rewarding beyond words to rescue a dog from the shelter and have that dog become part of your family.
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