Groucho Marx

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A hospital bed is a parked taxi with the meter running.

4

I never forget a face, but in your case I'll be glad to make an exception.

3

Alimony is like buying hay for a dead horse.

3

She got her looks from her father. He's a plastic surgeon.

3

Behind every successful man is a woman, behind her is his wife.

2

It isn't necessary to have relatives in Kansas City in order to be unhappy.

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Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read.

1

A black cat crossing your path signifies that the animal is going somewhere.

1

I refuse to join any club that would have me as a member.

1

Anyone who says he can see through women is missing a lot.

1

Whoever named it necking was a poor judge of anatomy.

1

In Hollywood, brides keep the bouquets and throw away the groom.

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Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read.

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