Joan Rivers
Don't tell your kids you had an easy birth or they won't respect you. For years I used to wake up my daughter and say, 'Melissa you ripped me to shreds. Now go back to sleep'.
More quotes and aphorisms
Democracy and socialism are means to an end...A national debt, if it is not excessive, will be to us...Liberty exists in proportion to wholesome restraint...In life there is nothing more unexpected and surprising...I always enjoyed being in front of the camera...I can't remember names and things...
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