Joan Rivers
Don't tell your kids you had an easy birth or they won't respect you. For years I used to wake up my daughter and say, 'Melissa you ripped me to shreds. Now go back to sleep'.
More quotes and aphorisms
Our greatest happiness does not depend...I'm looking forward to the future...Self-awareness is not self-centeredness...I want to know all Gods thoughts...People are not disturbed by things, but by the view...Comedy is tragedy — plus time...
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