W. C. Fields
Now don't say you can't swear off drinking; it's easy. I've done it a thousand times.
More quotes and aphorisms
I'd be just as happy being a midwife...There's nothing more satisfying than seeing a happy...The very basic core of a man's living spirit...If you don't stand for something...Even though I enjoy that head-to-head competition...To believe in love, to be ready to give up anything...