Demetri Martin
I wrapped my Christmas presents early this year, but I used the wrong paper. See, the paper I used said 'Happy Birthday' on it. I didn't want to waste it so I just wrote 'Jesus' on it.
More quotes and aphorisms
I'm tough, ambitious, and I know exactly what I want...Ethics is knowing the difference between...Beauty has so many forms...One should believe in marriage as in the immortality...Leaders keep their eyes on the horizon...Plant and your spouse plants with you...
