Demetri Martin
I wrapped my Christmas presents early this year, but I used the wrong paper. See, the paper I used said 'Happy Birthday' on it. I didn't want to waste it so I just wrote 'Jesus' on it.
More quotes and aphorisms
Great teachers emanate out of knowledge...I grew up like a neglected weed — ignorant of liberty...Anyone can hold the helm when the sea is calm...At the end of the day, the most overwhelming key...Clothes and manners do not make the man...Since the global financial crisis and recession...
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