W. C. Fields
Some things are better than sex, and some are worse, but there's nothing exactly like it.
More quotes and aphorisms
It is not from the benevolence of the butcher...I think everyone has dreams, and it's just how you go...Columbia tried to put me behind other groups...As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you...Dignity consists not in possessing honors...My mother was the greatest mother in the world...